the big b

Writing things down makes them turn real. From that moment on it's not just talk, you'll really keep what you wrote, you'll try harder than you would if it wasn't written, if you've just said it to someone else.

That's the way it works with me, things become real from the moment I can write about them. That's why I am writing about this, and that's why I'm doing it here 'cause even if I deleted it someone, somewhere, would have read it and that wasn't going to change no matter how hard I tried. 

Everything comes to an end, or at least almost everything and this is just one of them. It does not make sense anymore and even though it took me 5 long years to realize this I finally did - that's why I'm writing about this, something I could never have done if I still believed what I used to. 

Sometimes all you need to do is to think about yourself before you think of anyone else, that's what I'm doing with this, now is not to please to anyone nor it is because someone blackmailed me, this time it's for me, so that I can be proud of myself.

We all have addictions and they all stop at some point, so here it is mine, written.